This is a bit of a continuation to my latest post on starting my masters. If there is one privilege I have had that often goes unnoticed and unthought of by most, it has been the privilege of meeting people from different socioeconomic backgrounds.
I did IB in high school. (Don't do IB. IB is stupid, I always subsequently say whenever mentioning that fact.) And was thus surrounded by like-minded academic types who incessantly studied and focused on academic excellence. I also volunteered a lot around school and got to meet students who liked managing projects, yes, but we also just trying to get by. Clearly not because they were lazy or unmotivated, but often because their focuses were elsewhere. Such as, if they could pay certain bills, navigating an unsafe home life, and things to that sort. (All at an impressionable high school age.)
Many of their problems I saw were often absent in the minds of my more academic peers, who felt free to gallivant through life firmly sequestered in their pristine bubbles. This resulted in one of three types of students:
- The kind who simply studies and also gets by in their own way
- The kind who is bursting at the seems with stress
- The kind who rambunctiously proclaims their on top of the world
Due to my personal at home life, I was more a type 2. (Though who didn't want to be or pretend they were type 3?) But it also made me feel like I had more in common with those who felt so preoccupied all the time. It was a time rife with my own struggles growing up, and academic elitism from kids from other schools. (Yes, academic elitism in high school, often based on where you went.) I got into some of the same places and know see that none of it fucking mattered.
Fast forward, many of my peers are engineers and are going on and on about their numerous worldy vacations, scuba diving, hiking and what not, while trying to get 200k, even 300-400k salaries in the future. All of that's fine and dandy. Enjoy life, especially when you're young. Follow your passion, and there's nothing wrong with going for a large salary.
It's just that I volunteer for people who receive disability benefits, who thus have trouble finding work, and my most influential conversion in 2023 was with a man who panhandled near the skytrain, who had an entire family to help take care of and vise versa, and was losing his sight. I can tell you with 100% certainty, that they are just like you and me.
The difference is jarring, every single time. They live in complete parallel realities. Being around the latter teaches you how good you have it, in a way that simple statistics and theory can't, and sustains you spiritually, that is forever branded into your consciousness.
It reminds you to really value the simple things in life, and not to take anything for granted. Maybe it's because I never traveled much, (I literally catch feelings not flights,) but like, is this the person you're designing yourself to be? Is this what you want your life to revolve around?
Subscribing to the teachings of Neale Donald Walsh, there's a maxim that goes "your life isn't about you. It's about the lives of everyone you touch and how you touch them." And you are best-equipped to design yourself and your life to be able to do that, so it's about that part of you, in service.
Honestly the first part of that quote feels like it's something we should plaster around more places nowadays. A faint echo in today's vacuum of hyperindividualism. Now, at my worst I can be self-involved, self-indulgent, and enjoy entitlement. However, you will not be catching me going "it's best to just worry about yourself, and maybe the people you're closest too," anytime soon. I'm doing the work to design at least one member of the human species as someone who cares enough to give back.
So it's like, this is what we're doing? This is what we're focusing our life on? How much more do you need? When does it become excessive? It reminds me of American Psycho. This is coming from someone who loves fancy bougie stuff, and surrounding themselves with nice things. How the heck could you convince people that they should stop and reflect inward? Someone or something needs to tell people to open their hearts.
I'm not even an "eat the rich" kinda person. I know I'm looking for a well paying job, with luxury and abundance. Just, when did we stop genuinely doing things for other people? Where has that intention gone? Like how more self-involved can we get? I can't help but feel like this is an under-looked part of our spiritual crisis as human beings. My heart grieves for all the connection and possibility we've sacrificed in the name of the superficial, never fully conceptualized, let alone realized. Instead, we're so conditioned to enjoy peackocking,
Ultimately, this is a difference in values. And I can't force my values onto someone else, nor should I. As far as they're concerned based on what they're trying to do, they're headed in the right direction. Sure I can say, "open up your heart and go in a different one," but it's ultimately their decision.
Substance is subjective. You can find substance in anything as long as you bring the best of yourself to it, including things like travel and luxury. Though, I heard someone say it was an act of spiritual violence to be so exclusive. We're meant to be here for each other after all.
Now, I yearn for people with different intentions in life. Ones to bless other people, glorify God, or experience the greatness of God. (If you wanna do a bunch of crazy stuff to do that last one, go for it.) Or in a more secular approach, live life fully in a way that extends to the lives of others. It's part of my Faith and spirituality that such actions ripples out in great ways, seen and unseen. Plus, I know there are people out there who do wanna do good by others, they're just less outspoken online.
If you're the type of person who jets off everywhere, doing every which thing, more power to you honestly. Maybe I'm just being a hater. (After all, I'm finally giving it a shot this year.) But please, take a look around first and really understand how lucky you are and appreciate how far you've come already.
Blissfully yours,
Kaelme (Kay-Lum)
